Uncomfortable isn't Unsafe

Hey Ya’ll,

How have you been? Share a win with me! Big or small, I want to celebrate with you! 🎉

Here’s mine: I’m headed to Alberta, Canada in a couple weeks to speak at the World Diversity in Leadership Conference! First time there, and I get to dive into my favorite topic, culturally competent feedback. Wish me luck! 🙌🏾

Now, speaking of feedback and cultural competence… I was recently coaching a client about giving direct feedback, and I told them: “Uncomfortable doesn’t mean unsafe.” Let that sit for a second. Just because something feels uncomfortable doesn’t mean you should avoid it, especially when it comes to speaking up and correcting microaggressive behaviors.

I came across an article that illustrates this beautifully. Take a read and tell me what resonates for you.

RESOURCE:
Feeling Unsafe versus Uncomfortable: A Trauma-Informed Perspective

https://greatthingsllc.com/feeling-unsafe-versus-uncomfortable/

REVELATION:

There’s a world of difference between being unsafe and being uncomfortable. Unsafe means your survival is threatened. Your body goes into fight, flight, or freeze. Uncomfortable means you’re being stretched, challenged, and nudged toward growth. When we collapse the two, we cut ourselves off from transformation. Real progress demands we protect safety while leaning into discomfort because that’s where evolution happens.

Remember: 

1. Name It: Ask yourself; am I unsafe, or just uncomfortable? Clarity shifts everything.

2. Stay With the Stretch: If it’s discomfort, don’t retreat. Breathe and lean into the growth edge.

3. Take One Brave Step: Move forward while uncomfortable! Seak, act, or try. Growth waits on the other side.

REFLECTION:

• When was the last time I labeled discomfort as danger and what growth did I miss because of it?

• What one area of my life or leadership would transform if I stopped retreating from discomfort and leaned into it instead?