The Fear of Feedback

Why are you so nervous?

Author

Ama Agyapong
November 21, 2024

Hey Ya’ll! 

Thanks again for reading That Inclusive Lens, my bi-weekly newsletter! If you find it helpful, please share it with a friend. 

How was your week? Mine was incredible, especially after speaking at the 3-day National Legal Aide Defender Association’s Train the Trainer conference last week! It was AMA-zing!!!

Okay, so this week, we are talking about fear of feedback. 

Feedback is essential for growth—whether you're mentoring a colleague, addressing a team member's behavior, or facilitating a transformative conversation in your personal life. But let’s be honest: giving feedback, especially when it touches on sensitive topics like equity, inclusion, politics, or biased behaviors, can feel uncomfortable. Fear of conflict, hurting feelings, or feeling misunderstood often holds us back.

But guess what? Feedback doesn’t have to be scary as hell, rather, it can be helpful as hell! When approached thoughtfully, feedback can be a tool for connection, clarity, trust, and growth. Today’s Newsletter is all about shifting your mindset and overcoming the fear of giving feedback:

RESOURCE: 

Overcoming Your Fear of Giving Tough Feedback:  

REVELATION:

While 72% of employees rated “managers providing critical feedback” as vital for them in career development, only 5% believed managers provide such feedback. It is important to see feedback as a gift to help someone grow. Also, it is paramount to prepare before giving feedback. The article says ‘anticipate eventualities, ’ meaning prepare your responses for best-case and worst-case scenarios. Finally, systematize feedback by having regular connection points with your team and/or loved ones.

REFLECTION: 

Let’s start by understanding your personal fear associated with feedback. Ask yourself the following questions:

  1. What specific outcomes am I afraid of when giving feedback?

  2. Am I worried about how the other person will react, or do I doubt my ability to communicate effectively?

  3. Have I had past experiences with giving feedback that influence how I feel now? What happened, and what did you learn from those experiences?